It was a picture. I wasn’t expecting it and when I saw you I broke and reverted to 16 year old me. I got giddy, happy and terrified all at once. When I responded you disappeared for a little over a week.
A second picture. This time with a caption, “miss you.” And I knew it was a lie but I didn’t care. I told you I missed you too and I meant it. You disappeared again and because I cant help it I reached out. The shortest conversation ever took place, a quick exchange that strained two responses out of you before radio silence took over a few days.
“Send me a picture,” is what I got next. Stupid in love, even after so many years, I did. We flirted and teased and then you were gone.
I should know better. I do know better, but his hold on me is unlike any other. My love life has been far from fairy tale like and I know I’ll have to live with it because the decisions I make cannot be changed by anyone but me and unfortunately a stupidity hopefully part of me still think there could still be a chance for you and me. There isn’t.
Don’t pine for someone who doesn’t fight for you like you have fought for them, lovelies.
Truly Yours, Jona Constantine.